From the Palace: Day in the Life of a Medieval Princess
By Princess Katie (of Princess Katie & Racer Steve), HF Contributing Writer
Good morrow! Ah, I remember it like it was yesterday, although it wasn’t. Mother to Princess Persephone, Queen Mum Sienna asked me if I would accept the great honor of being a guest blogger for Hilltown Families! “Would I?” I thought to myself, “and how!” Up to my tiara in excitement and unable to fully contain myself, I proceeded to run screaming down to the Town Octagon (Town Squares are pretty passé here) “I’m going to be a guest blogger! I’m going to be a guest blogger for Hilltown Families!”
I couldn’t understand why I was getting dirty looks from all the townspeople, “Eh,” I thought to myself, “they must be jealous.”
The next morning, everything made sense as I read the cover of the Ye Weekly, “Shameless Princess Katie Brags of Being Guest Flogger for Unsuspecting Families Living on Hilltop!”
Yeah, you think you have tabloids, try hanging out in these parts. It seems as though you can’t even make your way through an enchanted forest on your unicorn these days without some pauperazzi jumping out of the bushes to sketch your picture as you make your way to barter for a double mead latte at Starcoins.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not always so chaotic around these parts. Aside from the occasional stray cannonball making it’s way into the Great Hall as you’re sitting down for a snack of medieval gruel with raisins in it, things are pretty calm…they can even be quite boring.
For example, there are two types of princesses here; the ones that like to sit around all day brushing each other’s hair and talking about the stink of the moat surrounding the castle, and the ones who like to spend their free time watching the King’s right hand man audition court jesters. I prefer the latter. In fact, I consider it charity. Do you know what they do to these guys if no one laughs? Allow me to just say “ouch.” So, I spend an afternoon several times a week faux-laughing at the same olde jokes. If you’re tired of hearing stand-up jokes about airplane food and dating, try listening to “How many serfs does it take to replace a melted candle?’ or the ever-present, “A knight, a peasant and the plague walk into an ale house…” Pahleeze!
One last thing that everyone asks me about is the food here in the Kingdom. Well, let me ask you this, have you seen many places advertising their deliciously scrumptious “medieval” fare? Have you ever seen a McMedieval‘s or catch the Food Network doing a show on E-Z Medieval Meals in Just 20 Minutes! Well, there’s a very good reason.
I’m sure I’ve overstayed my visit here at Hilltown Families but wish to leave you with this thought for now…no matter where you live, be it a castle or a cute little house in Florence, MA, you’ll find that things are pretty much the same all over. Sure, we’ve got horses and magical nymphs and you’ve got cars and computers, but without the two most important things in life, children and music, we’d all be living in the Dark Ages.
Princess Katie is the singer, songwriter and sole tiara-wearing member of the kiddie rock band, Princess Katie & Racer Steve. Residing in an often damp, yet gigantic castle, she spends her days writing songs, chasing her ever-escaping unicorn, Pointy, and wondering how to get in on the whole “Princesses don’t do chores” thing. She’s thrilled to be guest writing for Hilltown Families, but wonders if anyone has ever thought of somehow putting the ink into the quill itself. She’s finding the whole, “write two words, dip dry quill into inkwell, write another two words, dip dry quill into inkwell” a bit tedious.
- UPCOMING PERFORMANCE: Princess Katie & Racer Steve will be coming to the Pioneer Valley on March 8th at 1:30pm for a family concert & costume party at Lyman Hall in Northampton, co-presented by Hilltown Families & Spare the Rock, Spoil the Child. Click here to print out the flyer and be sure to MARK YOUR CALENDARS!
- GUEST DJ – PK&RS will be doing a Guest DJ set on Spare the Rock, Spoil the Child on Saturday, January 5th, from 8-10am on WXOJ-LP 103.3FM (Valley Free Radio).